The height of blogging…. literally!!!

The plan for my first plan journey began with something like this- my boss in Delhi wanted me there in office urgently. He issued a flight ticket for the capital. My mind screamed with ecstasy as this would not only be an all expense paid trip to Delhi, it will also be the shortest journey back to an office.

The first thought that actually came into my mind was that of 9/11 and the next one was from the plane in the final destination movie. None of them helped me with the anxiety as I stood in the line, holding a cup of coffee, to board the flight 212 from SpiceJet.

As the plane took off, giving a light bump and disturbing my anxiety for a nano second, I couldn't help but wonder what exactly are the safety provisions if something goes wrong in this? Before the landing, the air hostess did give a demonstration and explain about the safety but they mentioned nothing about sky diving or free-fall for that matter.

As the plane ascended at 37,000 feet, slowly, the anxiety died down and I actually took a peep outside the window. And the view outside was majestic!! For a brief moment, I could feel my eyes stretched, my eyebrows hiked and my mouth curled to mumble the word-'Wow!'

Sitting in a giant metal tube, hallmarked with human engineering we are trespassing in the abode of God and asserting our dominance on the sky. My train of thoughts was disturbed by a beep to grab my attention. The aircraft crew shamelessly announced that they will be starting the food service. Still apprehensive about the food prices and the quality.

As the heavy makeup glad woman rolled out the tray of food, I somehow missed the unhealthy food I gorged on in the trains so far. By this time on the train, I would have consumed a lot of vada pav and then hogged on the chicken curry with veg biryani on the Daund railway station (I refuse to call the abomination they sell as Chicken biryani). As I dug into the costly and warm veg sandwich, the prospect of eating delicious momos from the atta market in the evening kept my spirits high.

As the plane lightly turned, I remembered the final moment in the Matrix Revolution and the real reason Neo was fighting for. This view outside the window is worth fighting the machines for. The air hostess returns with all the fake smile she could muster to pick up the trash from the sandwich. Her colleague offers me a free bottle of water when the middle-class mind inside me screams with joy. The idea that you get a free bottle of water at a high altitude made me do the one unthinkable thing every middle-class person does- kept ordering it.

As the water entered the system, it was now looking for an outlet. Such in the state of one's mind is that the moment I stood from the seat, the PA system beeped and the pilot called to my attention, ‘Ladies and gentlemen, please be seated fasten your seatbelts. No one will be allowed to use the washrooms!!!!’ Damm you middle-class mind.

With heavy heart and a heavy bladder, I fastened my seat belt, shrinking in the seat, hoping beyond hope that the landing anxiety does not hit and the carefully controlled bladder does not burst up.

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Sharukh Khan and Cheese Sandwich

What do you do when you reach ‘Mannat’ i.e., house of Sharukh Khan on Bandstand Mumbai???

I had this dilemma this Saturday. You see, on a very hot afternoon I was to reach bandstand to meet someone. I sat in the bus very hungry for the train journey from pune-mumbai was completed in just one vadapav. (Arey, its Ganesh Chaturti, can’t have omlette and I don’t like cutlet and unfortunately the menu card ends over this menu in trains!!!)

So here I was sitting in the bus with Dipu of course, and the conductor tells me about band-stand and lo, I get down there. And there I see it, I see my ‘Mannat’ getting complete, I see a hawker selling Cheese sandwich…aah…blessed soul I am.

Dipu happy that she saw raging sea just opposite to Cheese Sandwich and suggest we take the sandwich on the rocks to eat. Well, frankly I see nothing else that the mouth-watering cheese and hear only the stomach rumbling. Then a van from NDTV speeds by and comes to halt on opposite side,

Hey, Something is going on here. Lets see we will come on TV,’ I suggest. (Yeah, desperate but hey you don’t get to see live action always right??)
The van stops opposite and guy starts filming something outside a bunglow called ‘Mannat. Lands end’Mannat Lands End: the doorway sign (Who wants to live at lands end?? :P)

‘Hey isn’t that Mannat? The bungalow of Amitabh Bacchan or something?’ I ask curiously (No offense Shahrukh, but hey, I got so many important things to remember, right? Like the alternate Id’s of Superheroes? Or even the festival prayers? and yes, my name also???) The bungalow is exactly where the bus stop is, where the bus dropped us.

‘Mannat?’ she asks, ‘Where?’

Now, if I was any wiser, I should have sensed trouble (Like wolverine maybe, sniffing..) then grab her hand and catch the moving vehicle and speed off from the street, like they do in movies, but no, that was a dream sequence, in reality I acted dumb, ‘There behind you,’ I point out.

‘OMG,’ she shrieked.

‘What? What happened?’ I could not complete…for her answer was drowned by the ragging traffic around as she crossed the road and was on the other side almost instantly. Clumsy me, but I had a cheese sandwich to order.

As a good boyfriend I had to follow her unless she falls into trouble in this unknown city (baah…my cheese sandwich.)
The bunglow and the bus stopNow as a true and very nice Shahrukh Khan fan she crossed the road and started enquiring to people, is this really the house of Srk..yeah…(You see I just miss the ‘R’ in SRK..I have S & K but nobody asks for me so much…baah)

So she innocently and cutely asked me… ‘Is it ok, if we wait here for a while?’

Now, if she had asked me to cut my head off with so sweet and cute voice, I would have readily agreed, so of course…I agreed.

Then came the long wait…(actually not long, for there was some moment near the bungalow, the Big guys secretary and the security guard moved out, but I was hungry and a minute was long enough for me)

Eventually… or was it a millennium?? i do not know…hunger over took over my willingness to be a good boyfriend and I was actually pulled towards the Cheese Sandwich cart. My lovely cheese sandwich!!
So the sandwichwala grilled me a delicious mouth-watering cheese sandwich (for 20 bucks!!! how mean) with extra cheese (woo hooo) and I carried the platter across the street only to find the black BMW in tinted glass drive by.

‘Where were you? He just drove by, you missed it!!!’ she exclaimed. 

I showed her my cheese sandwich and she said…’Oh God….tu bhi na..’ as in ‘You are…’

But the first sandwich entered my mouth and I felt… blessed…truly blessed.

So what I missed Shahrukh Khan? Watching him would not fulfill my appetite right???
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